Relationships are one of the most important aspects of our lives. We are connected to those around us, whether it be family, friends, or a romantic partner. Our romantic relationships can take a lot of work to maintain and grow. One of the ways to help protect and grow your relationship is establishing healthy boundaries. Having healthy boundaries in your relationship can provide safety and security to each partner, which provides an opportunity to grow and enrich your connection. In this blog, we will discover what healthy boundaries are, how they can build a stronger connection in your relationship, and some boundary examples to get the conversation going.
Boundaries provide two things in a relationship; safety and security. Setting healthy boundaries is an intentional action that protects your relationship and keeps it safe from anything that may bring harm to your connection. Boundaries are not a list of demands or commands for your partner. Instead, they are an invitation to closer intimacy and a stronger connection. When you and your partner feel secure with one another, it can help your relationship to withstand challenges and hardships that come.
There are a few things to consider when discussing boundaries with your partner. When setting a boundary, it is helpful to ask in what way will this make me feel safer and more secure in the relationship? If there is no answer for that specific boundary, it may be helpful to reconsider it. Another question to ask yourself is will this bring my partner and I closer together or further apart? The purpose of boundaries is to bring couples closer together not further apart. Lastly, remain curious about the boundaries your partner brings up. At first glance, some may seem odd or too much, but there may be a deeper reason why that boundary is important to them. It’s important in these conversations for each partner to feel heard and understood. If it becomes too difficult to navigate together, counseling can be an option to consider for moving forward.
Below are a few boundaries to consider when having that conversation with your significant other.
-Communication to others via texting & calling
-Networking events
-Social Media
-Online communication
-Finances
-Sex & Intimacy
-Family involvement
-Professional relationships
Relationships are important and it makes sense to have boundaries that protect it. Safety and security are things we all long for in a relationship. Without them, we feel unsure, confused, and worried. Boundaries bring intimacy, growth, and create opportunities for a stronger connection with your partner.
Written by: Dr. Austin Shugart, LPC